"Comparison steals joy," the saying goes.
Teddy
Roosevelt
You are
aware that it is improper to compare yourself to others. But it's frequently
simpler stated than done.
We can
compare ourselves to others in an infinite number of areas, including job
title, salary, grades, home, and Facebook likes. The number of persons we can
use as a benchmark is also small.
Comparison
typically leads to misery more quickly. It will only lead to despair. It only
serves to keep your attention on the aspects of yourself and your life that you
dislike.
Here are
some quick tips to quit evaluating yourself against others:
how to stop comparing yourself to others
Water your own grass.
We waste
time that we could be spending on ourselves while we are focused on others. We
tend to our own gardens, not our neighbors', in order to grow green grass.
Therefore, invest in developing and maintaining your own route rather than
wasting time comparing it to others.
Recognize where you are.
Something
that you refuse to admit cannot be changed. Come to peace with where you are
instead of fighting it or resisting it. Say "yes" to everything in
your life and then use that as a foundation to guide your decisions.
Be appreciative of what you have.
Be grateful
for what you have because you'll eventually have more, advised Oprah. You will
never have enough if you focus on what you don't have.
Remind yourself of your blessings whenever you catch yourself envious of what others have. That means being grateful for my family, my beautiful friends, and the fact that I live in a peaceful nation. Change your attention from what you lack to what you do have.
Compare yourself with you.
Compare
yourself to yourself if you must, not to someone else. What can you do to
enhance the quality of your life? How can you become a more loving and kind
person? How can you treat yourself better today than you did yesterday? The
only person to whom you can compare yourself is you.
Decide to practice thankfulness.
When we are grateful for what we have, negative emotions are practically impossible to feel. Consider keeping a gratitude notebook to stop comparing yourself to other people. Spend a few minutes (ideally in the morning) listing all the things you have to be grateful for. Making a gratitude jar is another enjoyable activity that the whole family can take part in. Find a jar, decorate it, and write down at least three things each day for which you are thankful. Put a slip of paper with each one's description into the jar. You'll soon have plenty of causes to be thankful for. Read a handful of the notes from the jar to yourself when you notice yourself drifting into those negative thoughts about yourself.
Be your own closest pal.
We
frequently treat other people better than we do ourselves. Analyze your
self-talk first. When you evaluate yourself in relation to others, are you
critical of yourself? Stopping your self-criticism is the first step in
becoming your best friend. Stop and consider whether you would say these things
to a loved one. Then begin recognizing and valuing your own special talents and
qualities.
Always keep
in mind that there will be someone more desirable, intelligent, or
accomplished. Knowing the special worth of what you offer to the table is the
secret. Every time you concentrate on what other people have that you lack, you
cede control. Comparison is the thief of joy, as Theodore Roosevelt once
observed. So reclaim your authority. Decide to focus your attention on building
the life you deserve and on believing in yourself.
Cherish
your past.
Your life
may have been complicated and difficult. It may have been tainted by errors,
worry, and dread. Mine has, I'm sure. However, each of those experiences served
as a catalyst for you to develop into a stronger, wiser and more brave version
of yourself. Accept your story and the extent to which it has helped you to
grow. Be happy with what you accomplished and with your desire to improve your
life.
Choose not to let fear influence your decisions.
Either love
or fear underlies the decisions we make. For instance, I relocated to Paris for
a position that truly excited me. That had love at its core. Because I was
worried about what might happen if I left, I eventually stayed a little too
long. It was motivated by dread.
All of my
fear-based decisions have been the result of insecurity and a sense of
shortage. Never once have they led me in the direction I desired.
Make sure that your decisions are based on love. What would love to do right now? is a powerful question to keep you on course.
Recognize your imperfections.
Someone who is wealthier, more intelligent, and more gorgeous than you will always exist. Nobody is flawless. The answer is not to strive for perfection. Therefore, embrace your defects, eccentricities, and imperfections without self-criticism. Accept your flawless imperfection and you'll be liberated.
Make yourself an ally.
That harsh voice in your head is capable of telling you all kinds of lies. My has informed me that, in comparison to others, I'm dull, stupid, and ugly (and a bunch of other awful things).
Choose to be
on your side whenever the critical voice of comparison surfaces rather than
joining in. Self-relief, self-soothing, self-comforting. Regularly encourage
yourself, and never say anything to yourself that you wouldn't say to a friend.
Make comparisons that inspire.
We
frequently contrast our backstage work with someone else's big moment. We
frequently overlook the countless hours they invested in planning and achieving
their accomplishment in favor of concentrating on their achievements. Allow
others' successes to inspire you rather than allowing them to make you feel bad
about yourself. They can serve as an example of what you can be, do, and have
in life.
The phrase "Money doesn't buy happiness" should be repeated as often as necessary.
It is
commonly known that having more money does not necessarily lead to more
happiness or well-being beyond having the necessities of life. A manager at the
upscale resort where I used to perform flamenco dance once told me that she had
never seen so many sad individuals in her life. The resort was visited by
celebrities and the super-rich. While money and other possessions can improve
happiness momentarily, it is typically more disheartening when they cannot
sustain happiness over the long term.
Learn to compete against yourself rather than with other people.
Focus on
your own objectives rather than how you compare to others. In comparison to
where you were at this time last year, where are you now? the previous five
years?
I keep a
journal for a variety of reasons, including the great things it does for my
sanity. It helps me understand and put God's blessings in perspective.
Additionally, it's a lot of fun to look back and flip through earlier notebooks
to see how much I've changed.
You have
developed, grown, achieved, and produced throughout the past year. Consider how
much of that you've accomplished during your life. Examine your old journals if
you maintained them like I did. There is no better day than today to begin
journaling if you haven't already.
Set time limits for yourself when using social media.
As we've
been discussing, social media comparison can have a significant negative impact
on our mental health. You can protect yourself by setting up the following
boundaries:
• Stop
following any accounts that make you feel self-conscious.
• Start a
timer, and give yourself 30 minutes to scroll. My friend, stop using social
media when the time is up.
• Put your
phone away while eating dinner with your loved ones and friends. Everyone will
be happier when you are truly there with them!
• You don't
have to respond to every comment or message; nobody has time for that.
• Consider
your motivations before checking social media. Do you feel uncomfortable,
bored, or need approval? What can you do instead to feel better?
